In the ’70s, KISS raised the bar for self-promotion and merchandising. They also wrote some pretty good songs too. But this isn’t about those songs, or the licensing and merchandising empire that they’ve spawned. No, this is about Paul Stanley, the Star Child, the band’s front man. His onstage banter is frequently ridiculous, and SoundCloud user Christopher Armes has put together a 45-minute SoundCloud compilation of his patter over the years.
With four Alive albums and plenty of bootlegs to choose from from the band’s 40 year career, it seems like there’s got to be more than 45 minutes of Stanley speaking out there, but if there’s one way to make KISS music even less tolerable, it’s by taking away the music and just leaving their preening frontman in. Armes describes it as “great for ruining parties and torturing anyone who’s trying to sleep.” If you can make it through all 45 minutes of this, you’re a better person than I am. Check it out after the jump.
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So, Devin Townsend had some downtime during the recording of Deconstruction and made this…
If you are not one of the 17 million people aware of what the hell this is, here is your context.
Your day is now better.
You’re welcome.
So suddenly, viral versions of the “Harlem Shake” are a thing. You’ve probably all seen at least one variation of the video, in which a handful of people dance to an instrumental dance song called “Harlem Shake” by Baauer. Midway through the song, there’s a jump cut, and then a whole group of people do the dance, or whatever the hell else. It’s really blown up in the past week or so, with sports teams, offices, and countless others doing their own versions, and probably has a shelf life of – oh wait, it’s not cool anymore.
That hasn’t stopped bands from having fun with the Harlem Shake, and both Misery Signals and We Came as Romans have uploaded their own takes of the video. Misery Signals’ version is actually kind of cheating, in that the second half is just footage from their crowd at a show. WCAR’s is fittingly awkward and nails the meme way better. Watch these now, before it’s not cool to anymore.
[via theprp]
Need something to preoccupy yourself with this weekend? Look no further than Bargain Bin Blasphemy. The creator of this tumblr account has taken it upon him or herself to give record covers varying from adult contemporary to holiday themed a black metal makeover. Most of the black metal face paint and altered words look to have been handmade on these covers, and needless to say they are hysterical. Seriously, how can you not refrain from laughing out loud at the sight of “King Crosby” (see seen above)?
Check out more pictures from Bargain Bin Blasphemy for yourself.
Oh, internet fame. Remember Juliet, the eight year-old that made her first hardcore song along with some help from her parents earlier this year? She has some competition now. We don’t know who this girl is, but this six year-old imitating the larynx-shredding mic check from Skeletonwitch singer Chance Garnette is a new favorite. And while the video was just uploaded a few days ago to YouTube (the same day it was posted to the band’s Facebook page), it’s already gotten over 12,500 hits. And that was before it ran on the Today Show earlier today. Yeah, that’s right. Skeletonwitch just got mentioned on The Today Show. Ponder that for a second. “Skeletonwitch’s Chance vs. 6 yr. Old (mic check)” will probably blow up even more now.
If you’re in a band and currently talking about doing promo photos, you might be able to learn a thing or two from Sleep’s latest. It was either taken earlier this year, or unearthed from the late ’70s when Matt Pike, Jason Roede and Al Cisernos’ uncles inexplicably got together at an Olan Mills portait studio. Regardless, it’s amazing, and easily the best promo photo since Big Business’ one from a few years back. And it certainly looks like sobriety is doing Matt Pike well. You can download your own Sleep promo photos (which come in a sheet of seven, just like your yearbook photos!) at Weedian.com. There’s one that’s big and suitable for framing, and six more wallet size ones to give to your friends. Thanks, Sleep!
[via Metal Injection]
By now, if you’re anything more than a casual Faceless fan, you’ve probably heard “Deconsecrate,” from the band’s forthcoming album, Autotheism. Not only is the song being spun on SiriusXM, it’s also the one song from the new album that the technical death metal band has been playing on the Summer Slaughter tour. Amidst the clean vocals, deathy riffage and carnivalesque vibe of the song, there’s also a saxophone solo. After doing some snooping (okay, the liner notes and a clarification from Sumerian’s publicist), we found out that the soloist is none other than the man in the above video, Sergio “Sexy Sax Man” Flores.
In case you didn’t have the internet last year, Sexy Sax Man’s impromptu public performances of the hook from George Michael’s “Careless Whisper” took the web by storm. It’s hysterical, and you should be watching it instead of reading this. It’s nice to see that he can play something besides “Careless Whisper.” Check out a fan-filmed version of “Deconsecrate” (complete with sampled sax solo!) after the jump, and maybe consider picking up Autotheism when it comes out next Tuesday (14). Read more »
If you want to see something that’s probably slightly too adorable for Metal Insider, here’s video of a cool dad playing a lullaby to gently rock his kid to sleep. The lullaby in question is Metallica’s “Nothing Else Matters.” The video was originally posted in 2010, but it’s just now whizzing it’s way around the internets. At least he didn’t play anything off Lulu, or he might have had his child taken away from him.
If you live in or around the New York area, it’s really hard for anything to really stand out. There’s so much random stuff going on that it takes something batshit crazy to get anyone to notice. However, today the interwebs are abuzz with talk (and pictures) of a woman that’s taken to knocking down newspaper boxes to relax on. The initial thread was about her laying down on one to eat a pickle. Why is Metal Insider writing about it, though? Because of her taste in clothes. While she might not necessarily be a Trivium fan, it didn’t stop her from wearing one of the band’s shirts in the above picture, which was taken earlier this month.
The woman in question might actually be a hip hop fan though, since as Gothamist pointed out, she’s in the video for a Death Grips song (go to 2:30 to see her enjoy a pickle). There’s obviously not much known about this woman, who the Village Voice first wrote about last year, except that she’s a fixture around the city, and is most likely crazy. But at least she knows how to relax.
pic [via]
Thanks to Dan R. for the tip
Back in the early ’70s, the Osmonds were the shit, a family of squeaky clean Mormon kids that somehow became teen idols via their watered-down pop rock. It turns out that all you have to do to make them sound Satanic (or like at least ridiculous) is slow them down. “Crazy Horses,” apparently a song about air pollution, sounds downright sinister when slowed down from 45rpm to 33rpm (that’s old timey record talk). Blog Dangerous Minds posted this, and it’s easily my favorite thing on the internet today. Original cheesy video complete with chicken dance after the jump.
[via Kim, who probably won't play this tonight] Read more »
In the ’70s, KISS raised the bar for self-promotion and merchandising. They also wrote some pretty good songs too. But this isn’t about those songs, or the licensing and merchandising empire that they’ve spawned. No, this is about Paul Stanley, the Star Child, the band’s front man. His onstage banter is frequently ridiculous, and SoundCloud user Christopher Armes has put together a 45-minute SoundCloud compilation of his patter over the years.
Posted by Bram Teitelman on Mon, Apr 22, 2013 at 3:14 pm
Metal Memes