Nothing sums up being a metalhead more than a leather jacket. You know, one that you’ve worn around for years to multiple shows, collecting each patch and pin as a road map to your musical taste. Sometimes, you don’t have time for that though. If that’s the case, then just pop on over to your nearest Urban Outfitters and pick up a vintage hand-painted leather jacket for $375. If you’re a girl, it’ll go perfect with your vintage Anthrax shirt you might have gotten there.

What’s wrong with this? Well, for one, everything. the Megadeth logo at least looks somewhat like the band’s actual logo. The Dio logo, on the other hand, is probably making Ronnie spin in his grave until he rises up out of it, rides a dragon to a rainbow, and comes back to earth to avenge this travesty of a jacket. The WASP logo doesn’t look much better. If you’re going to fake your way into being a metal fan, buying a jacket that looks like a Trapper Keeper from the mid-’80s isn’t the best way to go about it. While that might not stop Chris Brown, but at least the guy that designed his jacket was a genuine fan of the music.

If you fancy yourself more of a punk bandwagon jumper than a metal one, you could get another equally shoddily-illustrated jacket in that genre. Check it out below.