Outspoken lesbian Otep Shamaya (who also is the singer of a metal band, apparently) has written an article essentially stating two things: she’s getting married, and is going to become a man to do so.

It’s hard to pick out what’s satire and what’s real from the article, which is on the blog Blurt. She states that her single days are over, and she’s met someone, saving Hollywood actresses from her lesbianic clutches. After allegedly proposing to her girl, she states that the girl’s mother hit the roof about her daughter wanting to marry a lesbian.

Now, remember folks, this is the love of my life, THE ONE, I would die for her. If her mother, the laws and Gods of this nation, will not recognize our love as we are, then something will have to change. Drastic times call for drastic measures.

I am an American. I love this country. And I realize this decision might cost me my career, the respect of my peers, the love of my own family – but I see no other way.

In order to legally (and morally) marry the woman I love – I have no other choice but to …become A MAN.

Yes, sexual-reassignment surgery.
No, I am not kidding.
I am buying a penis. A real one.

Oh, how I will miss my magnificent breasts and elegant vagina!

We’re not buying it for several reasons. First of all, Otep takes way too much pride in being a woman to ever want to even consider becoming a man. Secondly, she takes things a step too far in the column, stating “As an added incentive, they are going to install a free iSex Kit (with optional internachging LED lights) that uses sensors implanted in the shaft to transmit datat to my iPod during coitus so that the speed and thrythm of the music will match the speed and rhythm of the fornication.”

If she’s really getting married, or has someone that she’d consider getting married to, good for her. And if she invents the iSex Kit, even better for her. Hopefully she keeps writing, because she is an entertaining read. Oh yeah, and if you’re into her music, she has a new CD out on Victory.