In case you weren’t aware, today is Prime Day at Amazon.com, which is basically the celebration of their 20 years anniversary and deals are all around the site for the entirety of the day but if you don’t think the deals are good enough, they can also send you some Jesus to sneak you into heaven.
A few days ago, a metal fan received his Amazon order for Venom’s Welcome to Hell and High on Fire’s
Surrounded by Thieves with a handwritten note urging him to get away from Satan’s path and look for Jesus, as shown in this Reddit post. The note reads:
Find Jesus before it is too late
First of all, let me clarify that openyoureyespeople.com it’s an actual website ran by a couple from Rancho Cucamonga, CA where they post all their Youtube videos where they discuss important topics like “Would Jesus ‘beat up his bride’ before taking her up?” or “Hasbro Play-Doh Goes ILLUMINATI!!! Sells Dildos To Little Children!” and we can only assume that one of their 144,000 followers on Facebook works at one of the Amazon’s warehouses, is really good at math to know that 666 isn’t a Prime number and couldn’t help to notice the evil covers and names from the albums he was packing, and decided to change a life by asking its receiver to look for the missing Jesus.
It’s kind of a throwback to see Venom still causing such a stir among christians after all these years, but is a bit confusing that High on Fire did the same with their album name, considering Jesus was crucified among thieves, which can only mean they are a christian band.