tom_morello_torture1In a column written for nme.com, Rage Against the Machine guitarist Tom Morello has revealed the he once worked as an exotic dancer.

When I graduated from Harvard and moved to Hollywood, I was unemployable. I was literally starving, so I had to work menial labour and, at one point, I even worked as an exotic dancer. ‘Brick House’ [by The Commodores] was my jam! I did bachelorette parties and I’d go down to my boxer shorts. Would I go further? All I can say is thank god it was in the time before YouTube! You could make decent money doing that job – people do what they have to do.

So wait, you can graduate from Harvard and still be “unempoyable?” I think what Tom’s trying to say is ‘don’t worry about getting into a good school,’ because that’s what I got out of it. How can a political science degree from an Ivy League school be worthless? Maybe there wasn’t a huge job market for making a “wiki wiki” scratching sound with his guitar in Los Angeles at the time?

The other thing we got out of this was that there’s probably a good number of awesome puns that can be applied towards Tom’s old job. Drowned In Sound, where we first heard about this, has the best one, with “Balls On Parade.” In fact, except for our tag, we can’t top that.