Metal Insider’s Top 5 is a column where we count down the top five of…well basically anything.

A few weeks ago, Rolling Stone came out with a list of the ten best beards in rock as voted by their readers. While that’s all good and they definitely chose the right #1 with ZZ Top’s Billy Gibbons, the list trended a little, well, not metal. It’s a given that the 44 year-old magazine’s readers would vote for the likes of Jerry Garcia and Jim Morrison, but even the newer acts made us raise an eyebrow. Because we want to make up for that, we’ve decided to make this week’s top five about the most unfolically-challenged in metal. And to bring things into the 21st century, we also kept a running tab of whether the beards on the list have their own Facebook pages.